Girls Hair cuts!

now if I were good at taking pictures I would have had an after shot of my Laira and a Before shot of Bailey.. but alas I don't. My girls love going to see Emily, she gives them the royal treatment when they get their hair cut.

Emily is getting married tomorrow , I will post pics from that happy occasion when I have some! We love you Em.

Our not so welcomed neighbors

Part of living right next to the river is dealing with some of the unpleasant things that come with the wonderful babbling waters. Some of those things are worse than others. Like I don't even notice the dead fish smell unless I move away and come back after a while. The hoards of mosquitoes are awful though. But the one that my girls dislike the most are the harmless Gardner snakes. The are out in abundance this time of year and that means my girls are even more scared to go outside by them selves.

Yesterday they were outside and they had been playing out there for at least an hour. I was doing something in the kitchen when I heard them both hysterically crying. So I went out side and they are both in the middle of my Dad's flower bed on the 2 big boulders just sobbing. So I asked what happened and they both choke out. "A snake" of course I am laughing because it doesn't matter how much we tell them they are harmless, or point out that when you get close the snake runs away. they are still scared. Now I am not heartless.. I am not a big fan of snakes my self but they are just part of where we live and they don't hurt anything. Now if it were an Anaconda then we would have a problem. I did a quick scan of the grass and told them the coast was clear and they booked it up to the deck to freedom. and now they won't go outside.. hence the bikes.. they needed a little coaxing.

I love my little drama queens

Big Surprises!

I think that the pictures speak for them selves.. I just have to say that I love DI and spent 9.00 total! the training wheels cost more than the bikes!

Sealing

Good times were had by all

Tag... I'm it!

All about me -- Alphabetically!

A. ATTACHED OR SINGLE? Single.. but hopefully not for too much longer.

B. BEST FRIEND? I have a couple ..Maureen, Vaudene, and Katie

C. CAKE OR PIE? Pie.. I am all about the fruit.

D. DAY OF CHOICE? They all blend together now that I work nights so no idea.

E. ESSENTIAL ITEMS? Contacts, Books, Music

F. FAVORITE COLORS? It all depends on the mood I am in and what the color is being used for.

G. GUMMY BEARS OR WORMS? anything gummy.. I like the gummies

H. HOMETOWN? Provo .. boring

I. INDULGENCE? Ruby Red Squirt, Sweet carbs, books

J. JANUARY OR JULY? Born in January but hate the cold.. so I am going to say JULY!

K. KIDS? Laira 5 1/2 Bailey ALMOST 4 and according to laira 100 more

L. LIFE ISN'T COMPLETE WITHOUT? Love and relationships

M. MARRIAGE DATE? it was Oct 5,2001 and the end date.. Aug 3,2003

N. NUMBER OF BROTHERS AND SISTERS? 1 sis and 2 bro's

O. ORANGES OR APPLES. apples..mmmmm

P. PHOBIAS OR FEARS? Thunder and lightning, Being left..

Q. QUOTE "Life is like an onion.. you peel it one layer at a time and sometimes you cry"

R. REASON TO SMILE My Kids they always say something that makes me laugh, and when my friends call

S. SUPERMAN OR WONDER WOMAN? Batman

T. TAG 5 PEOPLE: Amber, Tiffany, Megan, Katie (I know you don't have a blog email me) and Stefanie

U. UNKNOWN FACT ABOUT ME: I can bend my fingers all the way back.

V. VEGETABLES? yes please

W. WORST HABIT? thinking that people don't like me and are talking bad about me.

X. X-RAY OR ULTRASOUND? Ultrasound.. they are facinating

Y. YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? Yogurt, Fruit

Z. ZODIAC SIGN? Capricorn.. its a goat

In loving memory of my wonderful Grandma

Ora Egbert Darrington
Ora Egbert DarringtonSept. 3, 1921 ~ May 6, 2008

Together AgainOra Egbert Darrington, our beloved mother, grandmother, aunt and friend, passed away peacefully on May 6th, 2008.She was born September 3rd, 1921 to Marion Francis and Xenia LaVere Egbert in Oakley, Idaho.She was raised in Murtaugh, Idaho along with 1 brother and 4 sisters. She received her formal education at Albion State Normal.

While teaching at Declo Elementary she met her eternal companion Melvin Boyd Darrington. They were married May 19, 1943 in the S.L.C. Temple. To this union were born 1 daughter and 6 sons. Ora raised her family to work hard, laugh hard and play hard.Ora was well known for her beautiful garden and flowers. She enjoyed flower arranging, walking, listening to classical music, hiking with her grandchildren to the trip trap bridge, and watching BYU sports. She loved attending any function that involved her children and grandchildren.

The gospel of Jesus Christ was very important to Ora and she instilled a love of the gospel in each of her children. She served faithfully in many callings including R.S. President, Temple Ordinance worker and Primary Chorister. She served a mission with her loving husband to Winnie, Texas.

Ora is survived by her daughter Karen Powers, her sons and their wives: Melvin and Sandy, Larry, Karl and Marilyn, Kenny and Cheryl, Jim and Diana, and Max and Amy. She is also survived by 34 grandchildren and 43 great-grandchildren.She was preceded in death by her loving husband Melvin and a son-in-law Dale Powers.

Services will be held on Friday, May 9, 2008 at 10:00 AM in the Oak Hills Stake Center, 925 East North Temple, Provo, UT. Friends and family may call on Thursday, May 8th, from 6 to 8 pm at the Walker Family Mortuary, 85 East 300 South, Provo, and Friday from 9 to 9:45 prior to the services.Condolences may be sent to the family at www.walkerfamilymortuary.com Published in the Daily Herald on 5/7/2008.

I have some very special memories of my Grandma. Perhaps on a day when I have more time I will share some of them with you.

The Host

This is what I am reading. I will let you know how I like it when I am done!
If you want to read it too it just came out today.. pick up a copy for your self.

My Trip

My trip was AMAZING! Even with the drama that ensued I had a great time. I flew into LAX and was really nervous since this was only my third time really flying, and my first time flying alone. I found the rental car pickup spot with little help and was off to the rental company. When I got there they told me that it was going to be double what they quoted me because I had to purchase their insurance. I was kinda stuck there with no way to get anywhere else that I just ate it.

Then I headed out on the 405 , at 4:30 on a Friday after noon

and yes.. that picture shows how traffic was the whole 45 miles I drove. I found the stake center easily enough I am glad that I am pretty good with directions which really helped out. I called my Roomies and they were at the hotel which I hadn't had directions to. They said they were coming so I just waited.. after an hour they still weren't there so I just went inside. I got some food and sat at and empty table and some really nice guys came and sat with me and we chatted and enjoyed our meal. My friends eventually showed up and we had fun hanging out, dancing and even speed dating. It was pretty lame until I just started making up names for my self.

That night we went to one of V's friends apartments and sat in the hot tub. That was fun until some drunk people showed up and crashed our party by smoking and getting naked. We left and went home to bed. We got about 2 hours of sleep before we had to get up and get to the service project It was earth day so they had planned for us to clean up the beach. we were so late that by the time we got there the beach was pretty much clean. We didn't stay there for too long. After that we headed to a stake center for a devotional. It was very wonderful. We had lunch and then headed to go surfing. The surfing was so much fun. It was a beautiful day and they had it planned out very well. They had maybe 10 guys who served as instructors for us surfing retarded. They guy that helped me was really sweet and very patient. then he blurted out once that he wasn't Mormon and I just laughed at him and told him.. So? I don't have any pictures of my surfing because I was in the water having a great time. I got beat up by the waves and didn't see one shark. I was a little nervous since the day before a mad had been bit and killed on a beach in San Diego.

After surfing we went back to our hotel and showered and got ready to go to dinner. we ended up eating at some BBQ place and I had ribs for the first time.. they were scrumptious! We then went the the stake center for another dance and some went and speed dated again.. I didn't I was sorta danced out and just wanted to sleep. We went to Ihop that night and had a great time. (oh how I miss my pals)

Sunday there were some wonderful speakers and a great lunch. There was a musical fireside and then the conference was over. I was tired.

The next morning I got up and got ready and went to Disneyland. I rode some rides that I hadn't ever before. I really enjoyed Space Mountain. I got soaked on Splash Mountain and love the Indiana Jones ride. Pirates of the Caribbean is always a favorite. I didn't see or take any pictures with and Princesses like I wanted to for the girls. But I did see Gepetto, The Mad Hatter, The Queen of Hearts and Tigger. I got some great souvenirs for the kids and had a great flight home. Now I just have to get back into the swing of things.

All my LOVE!!

Out of town

Well my friends.. I am going on a VACATION.. this never happens for me.

I will have lots of pictures and stories to share when I get back...woohoo!!

Betrayed?

I received an email from my ex husband.. nothing he said in it bothered me until I read this line.

"no i dont read your blog! i dont want to! we happen to have some common friends that inform me when there are things pertaining to me in there."

Now.. Part of me wants to believe that I am secure enough with my self to not care if someone is "betraying" my friendship and letting him know the inner most thoughts of my head. That I chose to share with my friends. And at the same time, If I wanted him to know how I felt about certain things I would write to him and let him know my self. I would invite him to read my blog myself.

It saddens me a great deal to not feel like I can even speak my mind on my own blog.

Scott and Emily Engagements

I did this wonderful session with my wonderful friend EMILY!! here are just a few of my favorites!

New Toy

I bought a new camera.. I am still in shock about spending that kind of money but I am sure it will come in handy.

Hopefully I will have lots of new pictures to share.

Horton hears a Who

I took the girls to see "Horton hears a Who" the other night with my friend Sethany and her Husband. The girls were really into the movie. There is a part where it shows where the "bad guy" lives and Laira said "that is the scariest place ever" then there was a part where Horton was running away form the bad guy and he says "I know he is going to pop out somewhere" and the bad guy pops out and says "BOO!" Apparently it really scared Laira because she screamed quite loudly at that part. I was laughing so hard for quite a while after that.

They both really liked the movie and I thought it was great!

My little Bailey

Bailey is quite a silly goose. She is always saying very funny things, taking everyone off guard. On Tuesday of last week she had "the runs" she had it so bad that I had to put a Diaper on her because she wasn't making it to the potty. One of the times she was sitting there on the potty and I heard her say to her self in a very sad voice "Oh Tartar Sauce!" ( if you don't know, that is what Spongebob says instead of something like "oh darn it" )

Later that night after dinner I was telling the girls that they needed to get into the bath. and Bailey said "Oh .. because my butt leaked?" She said it with a total strait face. My Dad and I were laughing so hard.

I am behind..

I have some fun stuff to post about .. I will try to do it tomorrow.. :)

My Blog will be going private tomorrow.. if you want to be allowed then either comment with your email address or email me at Saigers@gmail.com with it so you can still read my blog.

Emotions

A couple of weeks ago I had court to work out some child support issues with my Ex. Now my life isn't perfect but its okay for now. I am still lonely but I have a great job, some WONDERFUL new friends and 2 beautiful little girls that keep me going whether I want to or not. Well I was sitting in the court room waiting for someone to show up that I knew, Either my ex or the attorney working on our case. Well I was starting to get nervous that He wasn't going to show and he walked in. And I had to do everything I could to keep my chin from hitting the floor. I have NEVER seen him look so aweful. He had gained alot of weight in a short amount of time and looked like he hadn't shaved in a week. His hair was long and his clothes were ok but not up to his usual standards. Now I don't want to sound rude but it made me feel good for once to have some sort of an upper hand. I was the one on top of life at the time. I was the one who looked like they had it all pulled together for once. I think that this didn't effect me so much because I went with the determination to not let him effect me.

I "ran" into my ex at the movie theaters the other day and he was with his girlfriend. I didn't really even look at him or talk to him but it freaked me out . And I hate that it does, I know I don't love him anymore but it still effects me. I feel that when I have time to prepare myself to see him or interact that I handle it well but its the surprises that really send me reeling. A friend of mine who is also divorced told me that he will effect me for the rest of my life. Case in point...

He has a myspace page and every so often when the girls are crying for him or something we look at the pictures and it seems to appease them. Well tonight when I looked something was different the picture of him and his Girlfriend was missing. I looked closer and he is now listed as single. A whole rush of emotions came over me. None really what I wanted. I would love to have been able to feel nothing. Or even feel sad for him that yet another relationship had failed. What I felt instead was some sort of sick excitement and some thing like my hopes of him being miserable had succeeded. I don't want to be the a person who is constantly wishing ill fortune upon others. And I hate that I am still somewhat bitter about how things go for him. I think its going to take a lot of work to be able to push emotions aside and genuinely wish for him to be happy. I think the first step is finally being happy and content with my own life and how things are for me. I think the bitterness comes from STILL not being happy and him seeming to be.

I guess what it all comes down to is that I know what I need to do to be happy and for some reason I just cant bring my self to do it. Its not like living the gospel is that hard. Its not like going to church is such a sacrifice.

anyways I just had a lot floating around in my head and needed to get it out.

sleep.. whats that?

I just worked a full 12 hour shift at work .. came home slept for 3 hours and am now a walking zombie taking care of my kids. I also have to work again tonight but only a half shift. Only 3 more of these crazy shifts then I will have them on nights my parents can help with the girls.

I think I am going to try and sleep now.

Empathy, Understanding and Spiritual Promptings

Someone has come into my life recently that has changed some things considerably Lets give him a name shall we.. lets call him.. Skip. Skip and I work together.. sort of . we work opposite shifts on the same floor at the hospital. We see each other rarely and talk to each other even more rarely. My first day there he came and sat by me and started talking to me, taking a lot of my insecurities away about starting a new job. Making me feel comfortable and adequate to be doing the job I was there to do. There was something about him. He was pure, sincere and honest. I could tell that he meant the little things he said. There was one thing about him that was interesting he wouldn't make eye contact, and seemed to lack something. but I didn't know what it was. 2 months went by and we hardly spoke but my interest was there.

One night the Nurses and I were talking and someone mentioned that there was a whole drama on he floor one night when Skip's ex wife was admitted and was adamant that Skip not be allowed close to her room for any reason. Immediately my heart started to beat faster there were so many things about Skip that I didn't know. That night I found out that he was indeed divorced or almost divorced no one knew. Also that he had 2 little girls. and that the youngest was very young. We all the sudden had a lot in common. but it was all a very delicate situation.

One day we worked the same day.. I was called in to work because they were short staffed and when I got there he was there and had been there for his 12 hour day shift. He looked tired, but not so much physically but emotionally. My heart ached to know that feeling all too well. When I looked in his eyes I could almost see the pain, if that were possible. and at that moment I wanted to scoop his fragile world into my arms and protect him from everything that was hurting him. I still didn't know what it was that was hurting him so much but i wanted to make it all stop. I found out that his wife had left him and that she also found out she was pregnant shortly after leaving. both things I know too well. He was on my mind most of the night while I was at work. I had a feeling that I needed to let him know how similar our situations were. But I didn't know how to do that "Hi, We are both divorced...lets be friends" so I just wrote a little note and put it on his locker all it said was "I hope you have a better day today than you did Sunday"

The next time I saw him he came and told me thanks for the note, nothing spectacular happened. but there was progress. long story short. We have talked more now I know more now. He finds comfort in knowing that someone else understands how he feels. But I still just have this protective instinct. I still just want to take it all and let him be okay. This person who is practically a stranger.. I want to take his pain and make it better. partly because I know I can do it because I did it and I could do it again. And partly because no one should ever have to hurt that much. Its not right. Skip and I were talking once about how much easier it would have been if our ex's had died, then there would at least be some closure.

So now there is a still very delicate situation. Something I am thinking about often. The more I think about it the more I don't want to date Skip. But I do want to know him, I have so many questions for him but I ask them few and far between. I tried to think back to when I was in his place and how much it hurt and how much you didn't want to talk to people but yet you just wanted someone to understand and how you feel so lost and confused about everything in your life and who you are. Its hard to explain how it feels when you are left by the person who was suppose to love you forever, you feel worthless and lost.. and right now Skip is lost.

So pray for skip, I will continue to pray for him as well and follow the small promptings I am given about what to say or do to help Skip through this trial.

Update: Test Results

My Doctor called me on Thursday and gave me some good news. The Mole wasn't cancerous but he is very glad that we took it off because of the amount of changing it had done in such a short amount of time. And also that I do have cervical cancer but it is such a slow growing cancer and in the very beginning stages that they think it will be fine. They are just going to watch it, I will have checkups done every 6 months. He also told me that it can reverse its self because cells have a natural self destruct mode and that the cervix doesn't like to be bothered and will most likely take care of its self.

so .. good news.. happy day

My Funny Girls!!

Bailey has been in Primary now for a month and a half and doesn't really say much about it other than she likes it alot. Well the other day Bailey lied to me so I put her in timeout. When I was talking to her about being naughty I said "you are in timeout becuase you lied, why did you lie?" and she looked at me with a very sad face and said "I chose the Left"

I had a headache and was talking to my sister while Laira was sitting on my lap. I told Ashley that I had a headache that hurt so bad I couldn't see strait and Laira looked at me with a puzzled look on her face and asked "So you do see curvy?"

My girls are wonderful and I don't know what I would do with out them. Even though every day this week they have made horrendous messes. Like today they painted eachother with nailpolish. But they are my angles and so precious I love them so much and they are always good for a laugh when you least expect it

Here they are playing duck duck goose with all their animals and dolls.

all our love !!

Invaided

This is going to be a loaded post. Even as I prepare to write it I feel like I am lying. I was going to keep this quiet but I figured that people would find out eventually and I just need to get it out so that I don't feel like I am hiding something.

Well my friends, The Lord must think that I am alot stronger than I am becuase he just keeps things coming just when i think things are good he throws something else in to make it bad again. so here is the deal, I have been diagnosed with Cancer.

I don't know much other than I have Melinoma and I will find out next week if I for sure have Cervical Cancer as well. But I do have cancerous cells there already. I will go in on the 22nd and have the Melinoma removed and my cervix dyed and all the cancerous cells removed. Everything will then be sent to Pathology and we will find out how severe it is and what will happen next. It doesnt feel real at times and sometimes I just break down and cry about it. So there you have it.

The Weekend

I spent the weekend up in Logan. I ended up renting a car so that I was sure to get there safely
My Cousin Heathers wedding was this weekend. It was a great time for all but Heather. She was really sick and was throwing up much of the time at the temple. She even ended up going to the ER and missing the luncheon. Poor thing. I hope that they have a good honeymoon.
I really enjoyed Logan and spending time with cousins that I never get to see. My girls really had a great time playing with all the kids. They get so lonely. Its so weird and different to have all of us cousins be adults with our own little families now. I also enjoyed hanging out with my Grandma and Aunt and Uncle. since Grandpa died and my grandma D on her way out soon, I just want to spend as much time as I can with the people I love.. soak it up while there is time. I know they are all in good health and still have time but you still never know. There are so many things so many stories about my grandma B that I don't know.

Driving home from Logan was a very scarey first hour. I had to come home through sardine canyon. There was atleast 2 inches of snow and it was coming down hard and fast. Luckly I had a rental car that did VERY well in the snow. I still don't know if my car would have done any better with it's 4 wheel drive. We did fairly well. It did take us a full hour to go 17 miles. 17 scary miles. There were times when I couldnt see the car 10 yards in front of me because of the cross winds blowing the snow off the mountains. we went a max of 30 miles an hour the whole time. Even the girls were scared. Laira said a prayer and we made it. At one time laira said "I wish my Grandpa were here, he is always so brave"

Speaking of Laira that is a whole new story. Last sunday Laira said she was feeling sick and that her neck hurt. I thought she was having strep symptoms AGAIN and was going to take her to the doctor. She then said she felt better and refused to go to the Doc. So I said we could wait until Monday. Well.. my car was also in the shop (another story) So we ended up waiting until Wednesday and our regular doc is out of the office that day. So we saw another doc. Well I had been looking at her all day long and couldnt quite figure out what was off with her.. well as soon as he came in he said " Wow look at those Lymphnodes" and then I was in shock!! She had 2 golf balls in her neck and when she would lift up her chin she looked CRAZY!! well her tonsils were also huge and had white patches on them so again I assumed Strep and was starting to worry since this is the 3rd time since Christmas that she has had strep, so was she going to have to have a tonsilectomy? at 5? ahhhhh
Well they did the strep test on both the girls and they were both negative. I was shocked. The Doc then told me that he thought she had Mono.. MONO... what? she is only 5... anyways he said if she wasn't feeling better by Friday to take her to the hospital and get some blood work done to check for sure for Mono. Well the next morning she was worse.. she couldnt even eat.. she would wimper while she tried to swallow yogurt and icecream.. so I called the doctors office and they said to go ahead and do the blood work so we did. Laira was very brave and was handsomely rewarded by the Phlebotomist. The rapid Mono test came back negative but they called me in Logan and told me that the over night test came back positive. So yeah how crazy is that .. my 5 year old has Mono.. Luckly they said that its not as severe in younger kids as it is in Teenagers so that is good. But they did say that it could take upto 2 months for everything to be back to normal.


For some reason it won't let me add images right now.. so all you get is text :)

I know I know..

Its been way to long between posts.... sorry! Where to begin.

Bailey has now had 3 consecutive days with no "askidents". HOORAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she gets so excited when I ask her if she is dry and she says YES!

My Dad called me early the day after his heart attack from the ICU and said he could go home and asked if I could come pick him up. So I picked him up and found out that he has now been diagnosed with Diabetes. We went over too the diabetes clinic so that we could get him a glucometer and teach him how to test his sugars. Both the girls were horrified when he poked his finger. Through the next couple of days I watched my Dad go through the grieving process. grieving that he no longer that the freedom to eat what ever he wants. Being mad that he let it get so out of hand.. and slowly slip into acceptance and that its what he needs to get his health in order and be a much happier person. I have so much respect and admiration for that man!

In other news I am working an unheard of 5 days this week to hopefully earn money for stupid stupid car repairs.

That is all for now

Heart Attacks and 5 hour fights

My Dad had a heart attack this morning and in the ICU until at least Wednesday.

I also spent the majority of the day on the phone with my ex fighting about stupid things and trying to meet a compromise that isn't going to happen.

Its been a really bad day!

Gimsies

Potty training and Bailey haven't meshed so well and I am starting to get to the point where I want to give up and resign my self to the fact that I will be changing diapers for ever. A couple days ago I was starting to feel hopefull.

I was teasing Bailey that morning that if she didn't get potty trained soon I was going to sell her to the Gypsies. Something that we joke around alot about. She laughed at me and said I was silly. We ended up going to Target and found some sparkly princess panties. I told her she could have them but we don't go potty on the princesses cause that would make them sad.

and you can't really see in the picture but all of the gold is sparkly and glittery. super duper princessey so you can't potty in those. She promised she wouldn't and was SOOOO excited. I asked her what should happen if she did potty in the panties and she said "you will sell me to the Gimsies" I laughed so hard and gave her a big hug and told her I wouldn't and couldn't ever sell her to anyone and that it was just a joke.

She did very well her first day but the days since have had some accidents. They are always later in the day and within a few feet of the bathroom (GRRRRRRRRR) So I don't know what to do .. I am stuck. ... PLEASE HELP! I need any suggestions you've got

Blessings

This past weekend I was so blessed to be able to spend the weekend with my bestest friend Katie. She was at her parents house visiting and stayed over night. We hadn't been together for a while so it was very fun to see her and her wonderful kids again. Her Husband had stayed home so we had lots of time to catch up and tell funny stories. We even ended up having a "sleepover" although there wasn't alot of sleeping involved. With my girls in Arizona I was quite lonely and very thankful for the fabulous distraction the Manning home offered. I am so very blessed to have such a wonderful best friend.

Thanks for letting me be there Katie.. LUFF you TONS!!

Snowday

These Pictures are from quite a while ago but I just hadn't put them up yet. Both the girls were absolutely thrilled that it had snowed and couldn't wait to go play in it. I dug out the snow clothes and we had everything but boots so we made a trip to the store and got boots and a sled.
My Brother Matt helped us play, We made a small sledding run in the back yard. There wasn't alot of snow because of the trees but enough to make it work and fun for the girls

Making snow angels was one of their favorite parts

After making their snowman with Matt

Updates

I know it seems like ages since I have blogged anything, Mostly because it has been. Life has been busy but I also haven't felt like there is much to write. Anyways with Christmas' fast approach I decided that I better put something up.

I have a few funny stories from the girls.

I was out running errands and we didn't have that many so we weren't out for a very long time and both of the girls were whining in the back that they weren't ready to go home and they wanted to go somewhere else, Well we were almost home and Laira said "There is Subway eat fresh, that's another place can we go there" I was laughing so hard. Who knew that commercials were so influential (kidding)

We went to IKEA and Laira and Bailey decided they wanted to go to the play land while I did my shopping. Well when I saw the "you must be taller than" sign I knew we were going to have a problem. The hard thing for Bailey is that she is a very small 3 1/2 and sometimes that proves difficult to handle. Well she stood up and was about 3 inches short she looked the lady in the face and said "let me try again" she walked away took off her coat and went back. She stood on her tip toes and said, "See.. I AM big enough" and yes on her tip toes she was, but sadly I had to tell her she couldn't go in. So very sad and dejected after her valiant effort she slunked away to shop with Mom while Laira got to play.

Lastly, Laira is sick. she NEVER gets sick and on the other hand Bailey is ALWAYS sick and she isn't right now and I think that is hard for her. Laira has 3 medicines she is taking for strep and Bailey has nothing. She keeps telling me that she is sick and will have me look at the out side of her neck at her sore throat. She also thinks she has Pink Eye since my little cousin has it. So I now have a little Hypocondriact 3 year old. I think she is just jealous that Laira is getting all the extra loves and attention and not her.

Things with me are going well, We are trying some new things for my Endometriosis the side effects are not so much fun, I am sick alot of the time, Nauseated and sometimes the room spins but I am hoping that like the doctor said my body will adjust and it will hopefully lessen the effects of the Endometriosis. Otherwise we will have to do some other things like surgery and I am not excited for that. I am still working and I love my job more everyday. The people that I work with are amazing and wonderful teachers. Now I just need to figure out how to go to Nursing school and make it work.

Thank you so much for all of your wonderful love and support. It means a great deal to me to have so many wonderful friends.

ALL our love.

Life back to normal??

Well my sister is home now. With some very strict and ridgid rules. Do I think anything will change? I don't know. Only time will tell.

Question

What would make my life infinitely harder and make me stress more than I feel I am capable of handling?

If you answered.. my incredibly un-smart sister would get in a car accident get herself arrested and thrown in jail becuase she was DUI so that I now inherit another child you would be correct!

This is all I can say on the matter right now.. its as far as my brain will process right now.

Go Fish!

Thankyou Walmart for card games for $1.77! My girls have been obsessed with this game the last couple of days. They love to play it, and when everyone was too busy to play with them today they decided to play alone! It was so adorable! I have great girls!

Brain Dump!

I have so much going on right now that I decided I needed to do what my friend Erin calls a "Brain Dump" and just get it all out.

Work, What can I say about work. Well I LOVE it, Last night I did alot of work on my own and it was fabulous. I am so glad that I love my job so much. Things that I thought I would have a hard time with aren't giving me any troubles at all. The people that I work with are great and even the people who others seem to have a problem with don't seem to have a problem with me.. yet.

Laira, Where to start with her? She is still super smart and super cute but she is really struggling right now. She has started to lie... alot. Her lies are mostly outrageous and easy to spot. but it just bothers me that she feels like she needs to lie. Any suggestions on this?

Bailey, she is still super spacey and super silly. But lately she has been OOZING the Christmas spirit. It cracks me up. She is always picking out toys for everyone else and telling them "good Job" and "high fives" She is a super sweet heart. But she still throws fits and tantrums when she doesn't get her way. She is still the master debater when I ask her to do something and she has other plans.

Me, I am still super fat and super single. (things didn't work out but we are still friends) I went to the doctor yesterday and they think I might have Endometriosis. I am not excited about that at all. I am excited to get to start going to church again. I've been told that I've had a calling waiting for me for a couple months now. I am also glad that I don't have to work during church anymore.

One last thing that is bothering me.. the predicted disappearance of the ex husband in the girls lives again.. not surprised... not happy about picking up the pieces of 2 sad little girls again.. Wish there was something I could do about it.

Family Pictures

These are from a while ago and I never posted them. .... Enjoy!
My Adorable girlies

Bryce thought this pose was super stupid

The Whole Family...

Halloween Pictures

So it turns out that the Memory card reformatted and all the pictures are gone.. My cousin took some pictures so I will see if I can get a copy of them from her.. other wise.. no pics

Tag! I'm it!

Four Places I've Lived

• My parents house in Provo
• My own house in Provo
• Orem
• Mesa, Arizona

Four Jobs I've Had

• Kiddie Kandids Photographer
• Wedding Photographer
• Secretary
• CNA

Four Things I'd Like to do Before I die

• Get married again
• Get my RN
• Travel
• Go on a mission

Four Favorite Desserts

• Pumpkin any thing
• apple crisp
• Ice cream the good kinds
• This caramel and chocolate thing Loralee made for a bridal shower
  

Four Interesting Facts about Me:

• I can bend my fingers all the way back to touch the back of my hand
• I am addicted to reading
• I have broken my ankles at least 10 times
• nothing really beats Meg's Bells Palsy

Four Favorite TV Shows:

• Pushing Daisies
• Kid Nation
• Greys Anatomy
• Moonlight
  

Tag: Andrea, Erin, Adrienne and Amy

Halloween

Ok so I took pictures for Halloween but when I went to get them off of the Memory card there was nothing there. So I am going to have to do some detective work and hopefully get some pics up soon!

Primary Program

This morning Laira had her first Primary Program. She has been so excited for it. I asked her if she had to say anything and she told me she didn't and that she knew all the songs. So this morning she picked out a dress and we even curled all her hair. she looked adorable. She was dying all through the Sacrament. She wanted to go sit on the stand and do the program. She kept telling Bailey.. "It's my program not yours, you have to stay here with Mommy" Bailey was very sad.

Once the sacrament was over Laira and my Dad (he teaches a different class) went up on the stand and took their seats. Laira was beaming she was so excited to be there. She found us and waved enthusiastically. They sang a song and the Sunbeams went first and then her class came to the front. The first little boys said his part and then they put the microphone in front of Laira. This is when I got a little nervous. Because she told me she didn't say anything. Well she looked at the teacher and the teacher whispered her part in her ear and laira looked at all the people and then slowly sank behind the railing on the stand and disappeared. I was laughing so hard I was crying. Then once the music started for the next song she stood up and sang, and she sang the whole rest of the program and cuddled with the boy sitting next to her.. *sigh* What am I going to do with her.

I had alot of people tell me it was the best part of the whole program. Silly Laira.. I love her so much.

Newest Utah Valley Regional Medical Center Employee

I was called this morning and offered a position at the hospital. HOORAY!!!!!!!!! This is something that I have wanted to do for a very long time and finally the day has come and my goal has been reached. It almost doesn't feel real. I went in and did my drug test and had my blood drawn for an antibody titer, then I went to HR and filled out alot of paperwork. They gave me a parking permit and I was free to go. I went up to the 6th floor Med/Surg floor and walked around. Too scared to talk to anyone, but so excited.

I have Orientation all day on the 5th and then PCA training for 2 weeks. I will have my schedule figured out at Orientation when I have lunch with my boss. I know I will work 3 shifts a week, its have of the noc shift from 6 to midnight. Its not the shift I wanted but you have to start somewhere. I am sure if I can get in there and work hard I will be able to have the opportunity to move to a day shift and work full time hours. but for now I am more than content to just have my foot in the door.

Thanks everyone for the wonderful Support!!

The Interview ......................(for Stef)

The interview was interesting. I was surprised at the lack of effort some of the people put forth. I felt very over dressed, I was in a nice suit and looked nice. The men were in shirts and ties and all of the other women were from semi nice to very causal

The other presentations were interesting to say the least. I did my presentation on the importance of hand washing. the others were as follows:

• a lady talked about a recipe and brought cookies

• a lady brought a spinning wheel and wool.. didn't even talk about it.

• a girl talked about buffalo hunting using sentences like "we seen a buffalo"

• a girl talked about her mission

• a guy sang a song while playing his guitar

• a guy talked about himself

• a girl talked about her self

• a girl said I took her presentation, and talked about MRSA (a drug resistant staph infection)

I felt over dressed and over prepared.... I hope I did well. Everyone else had experience working in a care center other than one other girl. So we shall see what happens, I should hear from them by Monday. Keep praying and hopefully I will have a new wonderful job soon. ( and then I can transfer to St.George to go to school if I can get into Dixie) <---that was for you Stef!

Thanks for all the prayers and support. I told my ex about the Dixie plans and he wasn't too happy about it, but he said it was good to be in school. So it sounds like he is supportive so we will see.

Presentations and Interviews... what?

So last night I applied for 2 jobs at UVRMC. I was very surprised this morning to receive a phone call telling me that they wanted me to come in on Monday for a group interview and that I would need to come prepared with a 3 minute presentation on anything I choose. I have done a few group interviews, but never with a presentation. Talking with my Dad he said that they want to see how well I can express and communicate something. He also said that they want to see that I have passion for something. Both my parents suggested that I do my presentation on Photography. While I do have a Passion for it i don't know how to effectively communicate it in 3 minutes. So now I am going to be stressing the whole weekend trying to figure out what to do for my presentation.

any suggestions or helpful hints?

Working

I did my Hospital clinical today and I loved it.. and I found 2 openings and applied for them. so please pray for me.

School is ALMOST over. I am very excited to be close to being done. However my plan isn't working out how I planned. I planned to be able to finish my class and get a job at UVRMC and get ready for Nursing school while I worked there, which they would also help pay for. Well everything works except for UVRMC, they are always hiring .. right? Well apparently not for CNA's right now. I looked when I first started school and they had at least 7 openings. I have been looking for the last 3 weeks and they have 0 openings. I looked at the other openings throughout Utah and there are quite a few. So I have a couple of options and choices.

1- Suck it up and work in Utah county in a care center and Wait on the waiting list at UVSC for the Nursing program. Which I don't even know if I can get into.

2- Move to SLC and work for Primary Childrens or one of the other many hospitals in SL county and then to have to wait for the waiting list for Nursing School at every school in SL county which I don't even know I can get into.

3- Move to St George and work in one of the many CNA jobs available and get right in to the Nursing program at Dixie college which my instructor says is a good program. but be 4 hours away from my family and not know anyone down there.

see big choices and changes. Don't know what to do.

SHOES!

I have a weakness for shoes.. I love them! And it's even funner to buy cute new shoes for my girls. Today we went on a shoe hunt Bailey needed new warm shoes for winter. We started at Shopko and they only had like 3 things in her size.. none of them something I would buy. SO we went to my favorite big box store.. Target! They always have adorable shoes.

I was surprised that they didn't have very many athletic type shoes in Baileys size. I didn't know that 7's were such a hard size to find. We ended up with these. They are adorable and she loves them

They both could have used some shoes. Their feet grow so fast. I know I will be buying Sunday shoes for both of them ASAP! And Laira will need something other than her Crocs that she loves pretty soon. They had a lot of really cute things, but Finding Laira's size seemed to provide another challenge. Laira is a size 11 they had plenty of that size, but I want to buy her 12's so she can wear them longer. But low and behold I couldn't find a 12 in anything I liked. But I did find these and they are so adorable so I am hoping with my next pay check I can get Laira something. YAY for shoes!

Anticipation

This morning I was able to shoot a whirlwind Engagement session. It was mostly a whirlwind because it was starting to rain and the rain progressed as the session went on. We got maybe 15 shots but we were wet and cold and so we decided to give in to the rain. We decided to schedule another shoot if they didn't find one of the 15 that they liked. I was happy to take the pictures. Photography is one thing that I enjoy a lot. I use to hate shooting Engagements and Weddings. I was always jealous of the love shared between the couples and often resented them. "why can't I still have that" was something I asked my self often. I was stuck in a rut of self pity.
Today though I was able to let up and have fun. I was happy for my friend and so glad that she was happy. I looked at their interactions and told my self. "I can't wait to find that" so today I am filled with anticipation. Its been a long 4 years and although I am content with my life now there is still a big piece missing. I know life will be that much more enjoyable when that missing piece is found.

Now there is a new "prospect"! I have had a hand full of relationships in the last 4 years. Some were local some were long distance but they all were lacking. Things are very different now, this guy (we shall call him "prospect" for the time being) has been a friend for some time. Although I think he is painfully shy there is alot of potential for alot more. We spent some time the other night talking about watching baseball and that I don't like to do it. He spent alot of time telling me that there is alot more going on than I think. He said " Do you think if I taught you more about baseball you would like to watch it more?" I said sure and my first baseball lesson started. He went on to teach me a few of the intricate things that were happening, but not too much so he didn't overwhelm me. When I correctly identified a curve ball my heart leapt when he said "I am SO proud of you" I left that night with a standing invitation to come over anytime and the garage code (a coveted thing apparently) although there are some mysteries I need to crack such as the way he will invite me to come sit on the couch and I do and he will get up and sit on the floor leaving me on the couch alone. Or the way he can never sit still long, He is always getting up and walking around or leaving the room. those things perplex me, so I don't know if he is scared of me or just can't sit still.

I would just like to mention that I HATE dating. I hate always worrying about everything! This is kind of a random post of random thoughts!

Happy Un-Anniversary

6 years.

*sigh* thats all I have to say about that